Fearful pride and other vices

What do you do when you realize you’ve made the biggest mistake of your life?  How do you move on from that awareness, knowing there’s no going back?  That the damage you’ve allowed to fester has become irreparable.

I allowed my hurt to cloud my judgment.  As my sense of self was lost I didn’t trust my own mind.  I permitted the voices of others whose motives were their own to alter my perception and, ultimately, form my new reality.  I entitled my fear to create an atmosphere of sheltered protection, and lived in hiding.  I lied to myself to show I was strong.  I would not risk unreservedly offering my true heart out of dread it could or would not be reciprocated. I could not acknowledge the fear and hurt, instead allowing anger to wreak havoc on my psyche and my world.

In fear, I lashed out when I should have opened my heart, asked questions and used my ears twice as much as my mouth.

I betrayed my heart out of selfish pride.  Needing to be right rather than kind. I lost my empathy.  Intolerance devoured it, leaving bitterness in its wake.

It wasn’t always this way.  A vicious cycle began and once the wheel started spinning it only got faster and farther out of control until the very air seemed toxic and unbreathable.

One perceived slight lead to another.  And another.  Until I became the perpetrator as much as the recipient.   Love hid behind thick walls, peeking out, timid and scared.

And I reacted poorly.  Now I pay for my prideful mistakes.

Goddess help me regain my capacity to temper my pride with empathy, heal and move forward instead of always looking back.

handling life's little irritations with perspective and creativity


speaks to the masses of people not reading this blog

My Way or the Highway

taking control on the road to mental health

Shed Reflections

...you'll be reaching for a beer in no time!

Escape from womanhood

Ramblings of a girl masquerading as a woman...

Ordinary Average Thoughts

Sometimes, I have things to say…

Chris Martin Writes

Pressing more into Jesus Christ everyday

Keelan Foley

Irish Music Blog | New Music | Reviews | Live Gigs | Festivals


Happiness Is Your Birthright


Abuse,narcissism,survival,there is hope,poetry,art,photography

Uncle Crappy

words. pictures. beer.

path: ethic.

taking oneself too seriously cometh before a fall

Fatshion Hustlings

Because people are fat sometimes.

Interesting Literature

A Library of Literary Interestingness


Fun Learning Resouces for Kids

brainsnorts inc.

"trashing today for a better tomorrow"

Being the Memoirs of Helena Hann-Basquiat, Dilettante

Home of your favourite dilettante, and her creepy alter ego, Jessica B. Bell

A Rich, Full Life In Spite of It

I repeat my grandma's words to myself at least once a day.

Villainy Loveless

Lover. Fighter. Professional Tease.

Blog Blogger Bloggest

Strange thoughts, random mutterings


Living my life uniquely as me!

Youth Of A Nation:Bent not Broke

Not all wounds are visible


In any situation there are 3 versions of the truth. Mine, Yours, oh...and Mine again. I win. You owe me cookies.

The Whimsical Circumlocutor

What's life without whimsy?

The (mis)Adventures of Jane Doh!

Life & humor from inside a rabbit hole!


Get every new post delivered to your Inbox.

Join 91 other followers